


it's killing me to love you

by grilledtrees



Category: Overwatch (Video Game)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Modern Setting, Angst, Background Relationships, Character Death, F/F, Flowers, Hanahaki Disease, Mccree is a real one, Mild Gore, Not canon character death, Unrequited Love, everyone is sad, no happy ending
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-03-29
Updated: 2018-03-29
Packaged: 2019-04-14 00:03:31
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 694
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14123748
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/grilledtrees/pseuds/grilledtrees
Summary: She knew that it was going to kill her. She knew.But she couldn't face never loving her again.





	it's killing me to love you

It hurts. 

Oh god, does it hurt. 

She fought back tears as she knew the woman she loves so dearly love someone else. She clawed at her chest, tears mixing with blood on the floor.

* * *

 

 Fareeha first met Angela when Angela was 16 and she was only 11. Around that time, Fareeha thought, that was when she fell in love with the blonde. 

She told only Jesse, because she knew he would never mention it. And he never did. Sometimes she wishes she had fallen in love with him, but she knew that wouldn't go over well either. She saw the way he looked at that Shimada person. Jesse had tried to convince her to get the surgery, "Because that's an option you have, Fareeha", he had said. She immediately denied the suggestion. 

Though, people were starting to notice that she was leaving earlier, that she was taking sick leave more often. No one mentioned it to her that rumors were spreading about her, but Fareeha knew. 

Angela was the first person to step forward, asking if she was okay. Fareeha gave a shrug, saying, "No, but what can you do?" as though it were a simple joke. 

Angela immediately went on to lecture her about the importance of health. 

She felt the seeds in her lungs rattle when she coughed out a laugh. 

* * *

 

As time went on, her mother noticed it too. 

"Oh, Fareeha," Ana had cooed, brushing back her hair as she hacked up violet* petals and bits of her lungs. Ana knew it was useless trying to convince her daughter to get the surgery, but it didn't make watching her daughter hurt herself by loving someone who wouldn't love her back any easier. 

Fareeha knew this hurt the ones close to her. It hurt even Angela. For some reason, Fareeha couldn't help but feel happy at the thought that Angela cared enough about her to be hurt.

* * *

When Angela confided in Fareeha that, she too, was facing an unrequited love, Fareeha's chest tightened. 

"I am in love with Amélie," Angela admitted, "but she is dating someone else. So I know how you feel." Angela had smiled at her and Fareeha wanted to scream.

She wanted to yell that Angela had no idea. 

But she didn't, just whispering a small, "I'm sorry."

Because she was. Fareeha wouldn't wish this disease on anyone. 

* * *

 

Fareeha noticed that Angela was getting paler and paler by the day. So, she approached her, giving her the same lecture that Angela had given her when Angela found out Fareeha was sick. 

It made Angela laugh, for the first time, fully. Fareeha forgot all about her problems at that moment. 

"Oh, Fareeha," Angela had said, "How has this person not fallen in love with you?"

Fareeha gave a chuckle, eyes watering, and replied, "They are in love with someone else."

* * *

 

Despite Angela reacting well to the lecture, she didn't seek help. Though, who was Fareeha to judge? She was doing no better.

"Fareeha," Angela started one day, her mascara running. Fareeha couldn't help but think she was still beautiful. "I confessed to Amélie." Angela coughed into her elbow, and Fareeha could see the deep red blood on her shirt. "It's safe to say that she doesn't- you know- love me back." 

Angela sobbed into Fareeha's arms, her tears, petals and blood all mixing into her shirt. 

She held in her cough, and she could taste her own blood. 

* * *

 

When Angela didn't show up to work for a few days, everyone in the office was worried. 

So, Fareeha and a few coworkers went to her house. 

As soon as Fareeha entered through the doorway, she saw Angela on the floor. 

Blood, chunks of Angela's lungs, yellow carnation* petals all over her and the floor.

* * *

 

Fareeha, no matter how much it was going to hurt, refused to get the surgery after Angela's death. 

She had told her mother, "I won't forget her. I won't forget how I felt about her."

No matter how much she knew it was going to kill her. She glanced over at the bouquet of yellow carnations on her table. 

No, Fareeha was not going to forget.

**Author's Note:**

> *Yellow carnation usually stands for rejection, disappointment.  
> *Violet usually stands for loyalty, devotion. 
> 
> man i love me some good good sadness
> 
> srry if its bad lol


End file.
